its 2 am,, and i dont know what to do..

hot milo at 2am. cant sleep. sudden cramps are churning in the middle of my stomach which keeps me wide awake till now though , i do so want to sleep. im so tired. got really frustated. tossing and turning for a while to no avail, get up , out of bed and here i am.

went to bowl with my new classmates. which i suck at, 40 points for 10 tries(i think) maybe just not my type of game. was at mac for hours and just talk about any random topics which came right into our mind. it just got deeper and deeper till eight. the sensitive issues which we werent shy sharing.

"have you given your first kiss?" everyone nodded except for me. we dont kiss, we just hold hands. i am clean, im a highly respected girl who puts my rights first before anything else, what's more SEX. something which teenagers nowdays are keen to have it at such a young age. i was being brought up as a fine lady, i have a pair of lovely parents whom taught me well. and no, im not gonna break it.

the world is changing. seeing a girl , way much younger than i am , having a bigger stomach than i do, walking with no shame. i dont know how things works to have a baby and these girls younger than me do it already.

i dont understand why it is so easy to fall in love and yet , it is so much easier to fall out of love too. when things got crumbled, the girls will always be the one whom feel the pain more than the guys do. waiiii??? tell me !!  at this age, ive learnt, relationship isnt just about love between two souls but apparently, there is another thing which a guy wants too. so howww? how to find guys whom are still virgin? howww?

im turning eighteen, err not very soon but still , ive yet to have a proper love life, i forget, eh no, i think i dont know how is it like being in love( well actually i do, but at that moment , i was so naive and it was so monkey love, how could it be possibly be counted as one?

nevermind. forget it. im just writting this post to fill up my worthless time typing something unworthy too.monkey love killed me once, wont let it happen for too many times. since im feeling slightly better after having a cup of hot milo. i better tuck in now.



love this song. it has a very touchy lyrics which made me teared a lil ! must listen!!