GLAMOUROUS²²

A tragic incident gets everyone thinking, and reflecting.well, it has been a pretty eventful week so far, and its already Saturday.mixed emotions and random thoughts.I am SO busy this weekdays that I already can't breathe properly; it sucks.My sleep debt, i guess i have to pay it back on every Saturday. o lvl mt listening comprehension went out quite smoothly,alhamdulillah.the part when the cd got stucked was an exception.all the Malay pupils had to be "quarantined" for hours and meanwhile waiting for the paper to starts.everyone were allowed to rest and this fellow even drool on his otas sheet. so groxxx right, and its not even funny. the question were rather tricky, and by the time it ends.everyone were sharing answers like as if, they had the answer sheet(says ahmad). revisions been leaving me exhausted,been spending more time in school than home and at the study table rather than at the bed at night while everyone were sleeping.i don't feel too preachy right now, doubts leaving me uncertain ,exhaustion's leaving me this nasty feeling of depression.sigh-

The most depressing realisation of the year (so far): I CARE. I care about my marks, my grades, my results. And it's the most depressing, annoying feeling in this entire universe. It is affecting me- the way I do thing, see things, react to things. Doing most things was not completely but as good as. I AM NOT FUNCTIONING NORMALLY. Not that I ever was before, but I'm not my normal abnormal self. Half the time my mind's pondering over my grades and I'm hating myself for it. And I realised that this time round, I can't just do minimal things and to also expect a miracle to happen.sigh again. sometimes i think i give priority to the wrong things. omg I'm so depressed.lol

i broke down on Wednesday during fnn period. actually, weird feelings engulfed me beforehand, but i wasn't sure what was it.i cried during the last period before recess and i couldn't stop even during our recess time,in the toilet while changing and it dread till the end of recess. but i didn't went down cos, it was rather too late. BUT, baz. charmaine.ahmad.tita and syahid told mr Andy and he let us have our break for 10 minutes. if not, i would have starve to death.

and the next day was RHD, still not decided what to wear. no qi poa. so moody.

ps: thank you to my 5 agents(lols), rifah!!,iman and syidah for making me smile (:
sometimes i wonder if life is really worth it, then i look at your smile and i know it is.irmy


not complete! the other 2 missing.

this post doesnt suites well for a happy mood .so RHD(which is the happier one) will be a nicer one to read.!to be continued okey!